battling against depression

I have been battling against the ‘big blue’ for several months now and just as I think I have conquered it, up it comes again.  This time of year is always bad for me as I definitely respond to sun light and normally in this part of Texas we have tons of it. Not this year, like much of the States, we have had well below normal temperatures and not much sunlight.  Thankfully I don’t live in the Northeast where it seems to have been snowing since the beginning of Dec and still hasn’t stopped. Quite seriously, I would  have been suicidal by now if I was faced with that. I have never like snow and facing day after day of the stuff would have driven me nuts!  I am not a fan of the really hot weather we have here either but at least I can cool down in air conditioning and the sun is shining.

Anyway, that has been about my life story since my ‘fantastic’ run in December. I think I realised I was more than my normal ‘blue’ self in the middle of Jan when I hadn’t entered my art room (sometimes called a studio) since before Christmas.  I had started to what is now my normal routine of getting up as Gordon leaves the house, to feed the pets and then I go back to sleep for another hr (or so). There seemed to very little point in getting up as the breakfast news (what news?) bore me to tears. Breakfast itself has become problematic as I have given up on the cereals as I trying to get serious about my type II diabetes. It has to be low low carb so my blood sugar does not spike and I can’t take too much in the way carbs early in the day. So that tends to rule out bread and oats (my favourites). Recommendations are eggs, bacon or other meats which is fine once in a while but everyday – puke. So avoiding getting up was an easier option.

Unfortunately the situation is ongoing and only today I slept in until 9.15am simply because I was happier in bed. I even woke up with a smile on my face after having a nice dream.  Hopefully things will improve with the better weather and also I have started to run again although most people can walk faster than I can run LOL.  Running does make me feel better and I am also going the aqua fitness group from this week as part of my cross training. Bought myself 2 swim suits so I don’t have any excuses.

Couch to 5K training

Much to my amazement, I am enjoying this training program although the hour before going I thinking of ways to get out it LOL. Much as I thought, I am one of the biggest runners in the group and definitely the slowest (one other runner who about my size).

1st 2 training sessions were a set program for 2 groups, faster and slower. Obviously I am in the slowest group. for the first 2 training sessions it was a 5 min walk, then 1 min run and I min walk finishing with a 5 min walk.  Actually in the first session the coach stayed with me and we walked/ran between fire hydrants which in the immediate are very evenly spaced.  For the 2nd session, I had obviously been identified as the slowest person so another runner came along with me and we managed to keep to the 1 min run/1 min walk for a total of 30 mins with warm up and warm down walks.

Last Tuesday was an easier evening as we jogged/walked to a spot in the local area where the coach had set a 0.5 mile course as a time trial. The first part had an incline (not that much) which I always have difficulties with. Even walking I can get out breathe if there is an incline, especially on cold damp days. This was one of these evening with the first strong cold front blowing in for the season. Temperature when from mid 70’s at the beginning the session to the mid 50’s when we started the time trail but fortunately the rain held off.  I was very pleased with my time – 7mins 35 secs- pace 15.22 which was faster than my Toronto pace of 16.10.

The only day I have been disappointed was this Thursday when I went out for my run and my legs just felt like lead. Even walking was an uphill slog. I tried to follow the program but it just wasn’t happening so in the end I walked  most of the time.  I think it was because I had been doing to some calf exercises the previous day.

By yesterday I was fine and managed to follow the program set. 4 min walk 2 min run and I min walk x 7, 4 min walk – total 28 mins

Today, it was 5 min walk, 4 min run, 5 min walk and 4 min walk. As I have never managed to jog for 4 mins, this was quite a tall order for me but I managed it 🙂

As well as revamping my 5k training schedule by joining a running club, I have also been trying to follow a more diabetic diet, so no breakfast cereal in the morning and lower carbs for other meals. Kind of strange to be eating egg, salad and nuts for breakfast but I am getting use to it.  I am not counting the carbs and I am not an angel so the odd high carb thing ends up in my diet but it does seem to be bringing down my blood glucose. Haven’t quite figure out the effect of exercise as that tends to send it higher briefly. Hoping my HAC1 will be back down to 6.5 or lower by the time I see Doctor Boyd in March. At the moment its 7.0.

I have also finally started to add rolling into my program. My trainer at Gold Gym has tried to encourage me in the past to do it and Gordon does it after every training session he does.  I got a smaller roller when we visited the Toronto Marathon sport expo from this company – Go Fit as the roller Gordon has is too thick for me.  It look simple enough but it’s not and it hurts if the muscle being targeted is tight but you do feel better for it afterwards. Next step is introduce the Myrtle exercises (recommended by Jen the Rogue trainer), which are more hip mobility which I definitely need